"Trust and wait for what is still unseen"
Romans 8:24
I have been pregnant a few times... Nine to be precise. Each time it begins with so much excitement and anticipation. Often times we began to prepare early, got the nursery ready, read as many books as we could get our hands on, dreamed and wondered about the little person growing inside. Who were they? Were they a boy or a girl? What were they going to be like? Would they have blue eyes like me or brown eyes like their daddy? As time went on, my belly began to stretch, they began to move and it got a little uncomfortable. The anticipation heightened. We prepared more. Waited more. Wondered more. By 8 months in the anticipation was turning to agitation. How much more could my body stretch? I needed rest! When would it be over? We wanted to meet our little one. We were ready to have our baby. But our baby wasn't ready to be born. It was too early. Each twinge and braxton hicks made us wonder, 'Is this it?, 'Is it time?' only to be left, sometimes hours into contractions, realising that, in fact, it was only false labour. Disappointment. More anticipation. More preparation. Everything to get ourselves, our baby and my body ready for the best labour and delivery possible. All babies are eventually born. No-one stays pregnant forever. .
This is exactly how I'm feeling spiritually at the moment. Almost full term pregnant. Going through every emotion- waiting, wondering, excited, slightly agitated, impatient, sometimes despondant, sometimes nervous and afraid and through it all, wondering how much more I can possibly stretch, knowing the answer is always-more. Wondering what this thing stirring inside me is going to look like and if every little thing that comes my way is the thing I am waiting for, 'Is this it?'. Yet, I know I can't stay pregnant forever. This new thing is coming. It has to. I feel it moving in my spirit and my heart the same as I could feel those babies moving in my belly. I am growing and stretching, full of anticipation of what's ahead, preparing as best I can, but knowing the One who held my babies, holds me. His timing is perfect. Always.
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